Effortless

My working hours for today was 8.45am to 10pm. Of course, I enjoyed my normal lunch and I stood around and chatted with colleagues for 30min in the evening. I had anticipated this and prep myself by sleeping early over the weekend. I'm not against working long hours if I have to, I needed to spend more time in office this week since it's my peak period.

But what I want to mention is about the high-flyers in my workplace. There was some high-level dinner for them and of course I wasn't part of the gang (lol). If we group the Civil Servants within the Singapore System, we tend to have the following: Scholars > Warriors > Farmers > Fertilizers and I guess I'd classify myself as Fertilizers.

I respect the scholars who manage to achieve a lot in their careers, especially in the Civil Service when it can be really competitive. I guess I could have/can still work my ass off to join the elite group but I'm not really interested. I'm just too chilled to bother perhaps.

I aspire to do a good job and take pride in what I do but I don't enjoy going the extra extra mile to be the elite. I respect those who achieve a lot because they're simply good, I despise those who reach the loftiness by being kiasu and kiasee. I don't mind demanding bosses; but I'd hate working for a kan-chiong spider who is afraid of making mistakes.

I guess I could never have been like some people who are earning big bucks. I can imagine myself just doodling or looking out at the window while the teacher is explaining the stuff. I can imagine myself as the nonchalant Berbatov on the field. Though I work hard during the training session, I'm too pensive to move up another level to impress my boss.

How did I become like this? I do want to be just like any other achiever who's kan chiong and all, yet I'm glad I'm not like that. I guess, I dream of reaching greatness through the non-conventional way, I just dislike things that are of the mainstream though I may yearn to become one of those successful ones through the system.