Would have written a long post

If I had my laptop with me just an hour ago, was doing the dishes when everything just came into my mind: the meaningless squabble with my mum this morning, the elitist environment that I'm in, the sense of unsatisfaction when I see those around me

I just don't want to be any other guy looking for that big break, I should know the way out already, just that it doesn't feel that way

John 1: 1-14

It hasn't resonated within me yet

I agree that I have a biased view of this world, but it is tough when you work in such an environment where the first lines after a meeting with your peers is that, "Are you a ○○?" In translation: Are you on such a scheme? It was easier because I was still in the running but it gets tough, knowing that I'm probably out and yet I have to see these people everyday, listening to similar remarks

It's made worse when the other groups perceived me as one of the privileged few, when I'm not. Yes I agree that it is a twisted world that I work in, it is only in our country where experience is valued a lot less than perceived potential and intelligence and sound judgement without the need for experience. 

Don't take me wrong, I enjoy my work, really. It has the challenge and I get to hear bright, young people, making decisions, recommendations that I am able to learn a lot just by working with them. Yet, it is the other aspect that hurts.

And what about the people outside the elite group, someone told me to count my blessings and be thankful. I know the lines because I use them to "encourage" others. But what about comparing with those on top, aren't we taught since young to look to those above rather than below?

Nevermind